Gothtober stan: Why we’re still living for ‘Zombieland’
In 2018, almost ten years after the hit horror comedy was released, Woody Harrelson (Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri) confirmed Zombieland 2 will “probably happen”, telling Digital Spy they’d need to have “the whole gang” involved to make it work.
That means getting Oscar-winner Emma Stone (La La Land) on board as well as Jesse Eisenberg (The Social Network) & Abigail Breslin (Little Miss Sunshine). Considering all four actors are fairly busy with their respective careers, it’s understandable there’s been a delay in the sequel. But come on – it’s time to make space in those schedules for Zombieland 2.
Writer Paul Wernick (Deadpool) gave fans even more hope when he told Vulture, “We’re going on the tenth anniversary of Zombieland. Zombieland came out October of 2009. We don’t know what you get someone for their tenth anniversary, but it may be a Zombieland 2. The hope is that we’re shooting that thing early 2019 for an October of 2019 release.”
Yes please! Get to work ASAP, gang! We’re still of the opinion that Zombieland is one of the best horror comedies ever made, so we’re hyped for a potential sequel to finally go into production and see the light of day. In the ten years since the film was released, it’s aged incredibly well and is still an absolute hoot on every level. Here are ten reasons we’re still living for this undead tickler.
10. The opening credits are an absolute riot
Showcasing a cataclysm of slow-motion gore, terror, and general zombie hijinx, Zombieland’s opening credits sequence is possibly one of the best in cinematic history. Set to Metallica’s suitably doom-ridden “For Whom the Bell Tolls”, the sequence is bristling with wit. Highlights include a ghoul bride attacking the groom, an “end is nigh” placard-bearing nut job being set upon by a horde of undead, and some sprinting businessmen who are actually upset that a lap dancer is finally hungry for their flesh. It’s perfect.
9. Columbus’s survival rules are totally applicable to a non-apocalyptic world
From “The Buddy System” (there’s safety in numbers, yo) and “Cardio” (keeping active will keep you living!) to even more basic rules like “Check the Backseat” and “Seatbelts”, Zombieland is basically a great rule book for life. The finest message of the movie? “Enjoy the Little Things” (like Twinkies).
8. Tallahassee’s raison d’être is hella relatable
All he wants is to find the last goddamn Twinkie left in America and honestly, we’d probably be living for a similarly mundane (but essential) life goal ourselves if the zombie apocalypse ever hit.
7. The undead are dispatched using an array of interesting weaponry
Sure – Columbus, Tallahassee, Wichita, and Little Rock use guns to fight the ghouls, but the best fight scenes of the movie involve weapons of a less traditional nature. Banjos, toilet tank lids, mallets, and even the ACME Looney Toons fave of a grand piano are all utilized in an expert manner.
6. Speaking of which, “Zombie kill of the week” deserves to be a thing
We know the Zombieland TV show was a big fat dud and we’re finally over that fact. But can someone – anyone – throw together a weekly web series celebrating the most innovative weekly kills of the undead? Please? We can pay you! We have Twinkies!*
5. The film doesn’t lean on generic tropes
Zombieland is incredibly shrewd with the way is subverts standard genre tropes, particularly as they pertain to characters. For instance, Tallahassee appears to be little more than a bloodthirsty, heartless redneck. However, we discover much of his violence and rage stems from the loss of his baby son.
Columbus appears to be little more than a cowardly neurotic oaf, but ends up becoming a courageous hero. And Wichita and Little Rock are introduced as the token girls, with Wichita initially appearing to be little more than a potential love interest for Columbus. But both of them turn out to be way more complex, fiendish, and unpredictable than anyone could have anticipated.
4. Stone & Breslin are absolute bosses
Honestly, it isn’t just refreshing to see two really well-written and developed female characters in a horror comedy (who aren’t slaughtered to progress the story of the lead dude). It’s also an absolute hoot to see them kicking some serious ass and having a great time amid all the horror.
3. It made the end of the world look fun
Zombieland is basically the most optimistic movie about the end of the world ever made. Legitimately think we could all cope with a zombie apocalypse fairly well so long as we have Twinkies, banjos, Bill Murray (Lost in Translation), and a ragtag gang of pals to help us through it.
2. That Bill Murray cameo, though!
Still the greatest moment in movie history! Better than Rosebud. Better than Humphrey Bogart starting that beautiful friendship at the end of Casablanca! Better than Clarence earning his wings in It’s a Wonderful Life! Okay, maybe that’s all a little extreme. But it’s good, ladies and gentlemen. It’s real good!
1. The theme park finale has yet to be surpassed
Showing Wichita & Little Rock fighting a mass of zombies at a theme park is a set piece and scenario every zombie movie fan has likely had on their wishlist since they first saw Dawn of the Dead. The location is used exceptionally well, with the two ladies clambering onto rides and using them to evade the hordes for as long as possible. More zombie scenes like this please, Hollywood! It’s been almost ten years!
*We can’t pay you and we don’t actually have Twinkies. Deal with it, zombie hunter!